When your Partner Hates Traveling and you Love it


The idea of traveling is immensely exciting to most people – seeing new places, exploring new cultures and cuisines, all these hold a thrill that can be matched by few other experiences. And yet not everybody feels the same way about leaving the familiar for the unpredictable and different. Also travel is becoming expensive with rising fuel prices and hotel charges. Indeed the stress created by differing aspirations around travel can even pose a threat to the stability of relationships. So if your partner hates traveling but you love it, here are few things you can do.

Destinations closer home

If your partner detests traveling because of transport hassles like overbooked flights, interminable waits at airport lounges and missed connecting flights, then explore the option of a weekend getaway. Look up what places are within an approximately two hundred kilometer-radius from your city or town. If you are living near the sea, perhaps there is a quiet beach town that you haven’t yet visited. Or if your city is located in the valley of a mountain range, maybe you can spend a couple of nights on the hills. Even if no remarkable geographical features exist nearby, perhaps a town with historical significance or hosting a large fair or music concert is accessible by a journey of two hours. A nearby destination would be just right for a weekend vacation – on one hand it would cut down on travelling time and costs and on the other it would offer you and your partner some quality time with each other.

Look for affordable options

If the primary reason why your partner hates traveling is the expense, he/she may have point. It takes a strong heart to see all the savings of the past six months blown up in just a matter of days. If so, then look for affordable travel options, for instance how about going out in a group. If you are lucky to have like-minded friends, it could be a great way of cutting down on travel costs. You and two other couples could set out for a vacation in a large van or a trailer in order to avoid expensive airline tickets. In fact many motels, hotels and lodges also offer healthy discounts for group bookings. Apart from sharing fuel and lodging costs, you and your friends could get together and take turns cooking so as to save on buying food from restaurants. Alternately look for places which are offering substantial off-season discounts. Tropical beaches which are teeming with tourists in winter might be running on empty hotels during the humid summers; likewise mountain slopes which draw skiing enthusiasts might not be so popular in summer when the snow has melted. Thus find out about such places where seasonal changes affect business; if you happen to arrive there during the lax season, you may be able to negotiate healthy discounts not only for boarding and lodging but also local sight-seeing. Also a destination stripped away of unsightly crowds might reveal a beauty and serenity which you will be one of the lucky few to experience.

A familiar context

Sometimes though it is just the thought of strange customs, different people and food that turns a person off traveling, especially if he/she has a personality that prefers the known and the familiar. If this is the case with your partner too, think of any relatives or extended family members staying around famous vacation spots with whom you could spend a few days as their guests. Apart from ensuring that your partner doesn’t freak out at the new sights and tastes, this way you will be saving on lodging and boarding costs which form a major chunk of travel expenses. The problem with this option is that you may not feel comfortable on imposing on someone else’s hospitality and that is the reason this works only if you are close to the host and hostess. However as token of your gratitude you can arrive with a nice gift for your host or help them with some household chores for the time you are staying at their place. If you are spending all your leisure time taking in the sights, perhaps you can treat your host’s family to a grand dinner before you and your partner say goodbye to them. If you don’t wish to intrude on anyone’s space, look for destinations similar to what your living conditions are. These are likely places where people speak English, clean beds and warm showers are available, transportation is abundant and food is familiar. All-inclusive resorts and cruise ships might be good options because the practical details are being taken care of and your partner has a familiar cultural context to look forward to.

Going solo

Sometimes though a person’s reluctance to travel is simply a personality trait and not grounded in material issues. In such a case it is best to respect his/her preferences and just leave on your own. While solo travel is no longer a new concept, it is usually seen as a way of meeting singles on your travel. While this may be largely true, there is no rule that people already in relationships cannot sign up for solo travel. Consider this as a great opportunity to make friends and get to know other people who share your passion for travel. And in case anyone tries to get familiar, put it across in no uncertain terms that you are in a relationship.

If the idea of solo travel still bothers you, sound out friends, neighbors, co-workers or even family members if they feel like taking a break. Sometimes it can be actually more enjoyable traveling with a friend or family member than a partner. While you may have known your beloved for a couple of years, you would have grown up with your cousin or shared several interests with your high-school pal. Essentially this means that you can go as much shopping or fishing or golfing as you like without getting your partner irritated who does not share your enthusiasm.

Again there are hobby clubs devoted to interests as varied as wine-tasting, art appreciation and mountaineering which organize tours for its members from time to time. So you can sign up with a travel club which these days cater to particular interests – for instance there are clubs organized around culinary travel or those based on adventure sports. While it would have been much better if you and your partner could have gone out together, still it is better that at least one of you have a good time rather than both staying put and making each other miserable.